It is tremendously hard to take personal responsibility that you are the one to blame for someone else losing trust in you. But, I'm coming to realize that it is sometimes just as hard and heartbreaking to be the one who has lost trust in someone else.
It's not just something you can fix with a simple solution. You can't patch it with tape or glue. It's just there, undermining everything. I'm reminded of the lyrics of a song I like:
"Well, a month or so has passed and now you're back again with me
But the cracks remain unmended in our once so-perfect team.
We seem to spend all our time just trying to make things right
But there cannot be a winner in this neverending fight."
It's like that.
You can try to fix everything else... but the loss of trust just sort of hangs out in there, picking at the tape, melting the glue. Just always there... and that's true whether you're the one that broke the trust or the one who lost theirs.
It's just sad... that's all. It's just sad to know there is no trust where there once was much.