Almost two years ago, I was asked if I would take on a "position" that involved writing for the CT Times (Celtic Thunder's monthly newsletter) and helping to run their Facebook page. The person who was in charge of those things had read my account of the inaugural Celtic Thunder Cruise and figured out I could kinda sorta write.
In the end, I turned it down -- for a number of reasons, I suppose.
I honestly probably would've enjoyed the "job" of writing for the newsletter -- if given the tools to do so effectively. I like to write... I love Celtic Thunder. It seemed like it could have been a match made in heaven... There are lots of things that could be done to improve its readability and I would have been excited for the chance to do that -- but the lack of editorial control would have done me in.
Officially, I turned it down because it was a volunteer position that would have taken up far too much of my time. In truth, I didn't care that much about being paid. But I did care about my time and my talents being valued. At that point, I'd given a great deal of "free" time to Celtic Thunder -- and I had done so willingly!! But I was at a point within myself that I was willing to expect that my time would be respected.
I had to laugh a little when a rather condescending reply came back to me, extolling the virtues of the CT Times internship and how that would open doors for me in the music industry. Clearly, the person didn't know me very well or my less-than-zero desire to work in the music business.
Looking back... those things are all still true... but I think that I was just as much moved by my desire to not have to police grown-ups into acting like grown-ups anymore. It was exhausting, emotionally draining, and I just didn't want it to be my job any longer.
I suppose I still feel that way.
I think it's a lot of why I'm limited about what I say on the internet anymore. Politics, religion... all the things that get us fired up, make us think that we need to go to Internet War. The passive aggressive shows, the pity parties, the boardie stomps.
It hardly seems worth it...