Friday, June 21, 2013

"Let's Pretend This Never Happened" -- A Recommendation

So, there's this book I want to tell you about. I first stumbled onto Jenny Lawson, not as a book author, but as a blogger.  Specifically, it was a story about a big metal chicken. I thought it was hilarious.  More so, because my mom not-collects chickens (it's a long story), and it sent me into convulsive laughter.  And when I sent the link to my mom, her only response was "Don't even think about it."

I was at Target a few months ago, wandering down the book aisle when I passed this book, Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir. I'm not really sure what made me pick it up, to be honest. The picture of the mouse in costume? The description of a "mostly true" memoir?  I don't really know.  But, when I turned it over to read the back cover, I recognized the author's picture and threw it in my basket.

This is probably one of the funniest books I've read in recent memory.  Or in memory, period. There were many times that I was laughing so hard, I was crying. Jenny is kickass funny.  Like, serious.

But, I didn't want to just recommend this book without caveat.  I can think of friends who probably wouldn't enjoy it for various reasons, so I was going to say that if you are easily offended by... anything, you might not enjoy it. There's a lot of swearing.  And use of the word "vagina." And references to reviews of porn. And PETA enthusiasts might not be the book's target audience?  I mean, not in a bad way, just... So, that was going to be my caveat.  "If you are easily offended, this may not be for you."

But then, there was the day that I shared an excerpt on my Facebook.  It was a story about how her dad once told her and her sister to pick out a movie to go to, and it was this big long thing, and when they got all done picking out the perfect movie, they found out that they weren't really going...  and then she started talking about how they were going to call their dad in the nursing home and tell him they were going to pick him up for Christmas and not show up.  I laughed and laughed.

Understand that the thread that is weaved through my entire childhood was my dad taking us places and calling out "Who wants a milkshake??" as Dairy Queen loomed in the distance.  And when my sisters and I all screeched in excitement that we soooo did, my dad's answer would be, "Just checking..." as we drove right by.  I knew my sisters would appreciate this story, so I posted it as a Facebook status and was mildly amused at the responses from some of my friends about what an awful story it was, on both sides.  (My sisters both cracked up.)

(Before you get on your high horse, Mother, let's just remember who took us on picnics in the snow and hurriedly shooed us all back in the car while the hunters were shooting at us. I told you "Pin the Antlers on the Doe" was a terrible game to play in October. Also, I guess does don't have antlers.)

So, my conclusion on caveats is this: If you are easily offended, you might not like this book.  If you had a normal upbringing, you might also not like this book.  If your childhood was totally warped, get thee to a bookstore STAT.  You will LAUGH.

And then, please come back and talk to me about it because it is tragic that I am the only person I know who's read this book.


  1. i so need a funny book;) Did you read Dad is Fat?? Funny!!

  2. Highly recommended for anyone with a sense of humor, an open and/or warped mind, or a box of kittens.

    Zaira Lynn (TRUSTprice - Software Download)


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